What It's Like

I was in Mydin looking for hand soap while everyone else in the store was looking at me. It had been ten minutes since I arrived at my apartment in Terengganu, and this, I realized, was my first taste of culture shock. Their culture shock.

Nothing was that strange to me. Mydin is the Malaysian version of a CVS or RiteAid, so the store’s appearance or layout was familiar, and most products had some English printed on them. All women wear head scarves, so that’s a little different but not much. And sure I was the only white guy around and no one spoke English, but that happens a lot in New York as well. All in all, I might as well have been way out in Queens.

Except for all the looks. My apartment is way out in the suburbs of Kuala Terengganu, and they do not get Westerners here. My culture shock was their culture shock. It takes time getting used to being looked at everywhere you go.

This, I assume, is what it’s like to be a celebrity.

Sometimes, I even get to be a popular celebrity like...

Children and teenagers are the most likely to get excited, yell hello and wave. Anyone who has taken an English class will strike up a conversation in order to get some practice in. And once, a guy working at a lamp store knocked real loud on the window and gave me the peace sign (at first confusing me since I didn’t want two lamps).

But more often I'm a celebrity like...

Now, I’ve never seen Freddie Prince Jr., but I can tell you exactly what goes through everyone’s mind who has. “Why does that guy look familiar? Oh yeah, it’s the dude from She’s All That (or Wing Commander). What’s he doing here? That’s so weird. Isn’t there some special store for has been D-list celebrities? Hey, that’d be a pretty good show for VH-1. But anyway, you make me sick, standing there all unassuming like but obviously smug in your former-semi-famousness. Get over yourself. So what, you got to make out with Rachael Leigh Cook? I'm not that jealous...At least I wasn’t in Scooby Doo. Argh!! Thanks for coming around and wasting my day by making me spend this much time thinking about you. You’re not better than me.”

At first it was unnerving having most people react to me this way, but eye contact, a smile and a hello goes a long way in easing their concerns. It also probably helps that I wasn’t cast in Scooby Doo 2. I hope they finish the trilogy.